I was feeling fine until I took a Benadryl for my allergies last night and for some reason it upset my stomach and I'm still feeling kind of queasy/heartburnish this morning. Might just be a coincidence and have nothing to do with taking the antihistamine, especially since I've taken that for years for allergies and not had that problem. Despite that I'm laying low this morning because I feel so distracted by how bad I feel.
I just realized this morning the kittens are starting to no longer look like kittens. They are five months old now and starting to get some cat features. They still look like kittens sometimes, but like just now Snow was just sitting on the arm of the couch and I could definitely see some "cat" characteristics.
I see the same thing sometimes in my seven year old daughter. Sometimes I look at her and I can see what she's going to look like as a teenager and it's really weird. So far it looks like she's going to be a very beautiful teenager and I wonder if that's going to be a problem. One of my friends once said she hoped her daughters wouldn't be beautiful because it's hard to be beautiful. I actually thought it made things a lot easier - although it was hard to keep my feet on the ground and not go totally shallow, which I did for awhile. Just like I think having natural talent and a naturally high IQ are gifts that make it easier to get through life in our society. Of course, having things easier might be a bad thing. Oh yeah, there's that. Hmmm ... Well, my daughter will be who she will be, I just hope she makes better decisions than I did was a teen and young adult. I'm amazed I managed to get my life together and I don't want my daughter to walk that tenuous line like I did, I'd like her to just start off making at least semi-better decisions than I did.
Yesterday when I road Toad after training a very cool and strange thing happened. I climbed up on her back, started to walk off with her and realized that I wasn't feeling scared at all. I was feeling just like I did when I got up on Girlfriend or one of the horses I know pretty well from my old stable. I wasn't holding my breath or worrying about what "this crazy horse was going to do". Yay! I'm finally getting over all the stuff I heard about her before I got her that made me scared to ride her. I knew that I would start getting over that eventually because of how she acts with me and Trainer V. and Trainer K. is totally different than the stories I heard about her. She acts like a very sweet, attentive, snuggly horse with us and although she gets a little crazy on the lunge line, she just wants to please and wants to get it right. We didn't do very well in our ride, she still has trouble balancing at a trot to the right and without a very experienced rider like Trainer V. it's hard for her - well when I'm riding her. So, I will need a lot of lessons and practice before we're totally working together well as a team. Maybe by next summer she'll be ready for some Intro tests at schooling shows but we'll have to work together a lot before then. She'd be ready for sure with Trainer V. and Trainer K. but we'll have to see with me since she's so green she really needs the support of a really accomplished rider.
I made a decision recently and let the trainers know that I wanted Trainer K. to be the lead trainer and there was some unhappy feelings about that. Hopefully, that will blow over soon. But since Trainer V. has been the trainer doing all the riding I have a feeling that I will have to be riding a lot more next month. I know that will be good for me, and I'm hoping it will be good for Toad although I'm not completely sure. I'm still looking for someone to do a partial lease with her. It was easy to find someone for Girlfriend but not so easy for Toad. Maybe as spring gets closer maybe a rider who doesn't have her own horse but wants to show in dressage will come around.