Friday, February 10, 2012

One big deflated bouncy house

That's what I am feeling like today.  A bouncy house that deflated and still has kids trying to jump inside of me.  I've had pressure on me from all ends - work has been extra busy and wants me to be their highest priority.  My friend in hiding from an abusive relationship has needed me with help driving her to court, etc. and my conscience tells me that is highest priority.  And my daughter has needed me which my heart tells me is the highest priority.  And on top of it the housecleaning has gone all to hell in the last two weeks and my friend's horse is having a baby any minute (may have had it last night ... haven't heard) and I've been trying to help with that too.  Ugh.  Maybe a better analogy is that I feel drawn & quartered - especially because there are horses in the equation.  Oh, and did I mention my horse hurt her neck last week and needed the vet to come out in the midst of all my other chaos and then the other day cut her leg and it had to be cleaned and dressed?  Drawn and whatever quartered would be but five times instead. Pentagoned? Or just penta-ed?

And on top of it I'm failing miserably at all of them.  At least it feels like it.  At least the feedback I'm getting from work is I'm failing miserably at meeting their important deadlines.  My daughter of course is at the age where she revels in me thinking I'm failing miserably as a parent and my horse being an equal drama queen as my daughter probably does too.  I think my friend I'm helping is just happy to be moving forward from her bad situation and isn't really thinking about judging the qualitative efforts of her friends to help her.  Oh, and Girlfriend runs out of Pergolide for her Cushings on Sunday so I need to see if I can get more of that before then even though my order for a new prescription hasn't come in yet.  Fuck.

I also don't have a new job lined up for next month and I'm quite worried.  I've decided my next career should be dog trainer and educator.  But I need another job before I can do that because I need to get a more formal education on dog behavior.  I'm pretty well versed in it already but I need something to put on my resume and I don't have any formal education to put there.  I also think it's high time grade schools had someone come in and talk to young children about animal safety.  So many kids either think that all dogs are friendly, cuddly hamsters or are terrified of them.  When I was a kid I remember teachers talking about bike laws and bike safety, animal safety, safety in the community in general. But now days all the teachers are dancing to the WASL and No Child Left Behind and aren't able to teach anything beyond standardized testing because that is the highest priority and focus.  So, no education on how to survive in the world in general.  And if parents aren't teaching that then the kids never learn it.  I think "guest speakers" or an assembly on animal safety once a year is in order.

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