Wednesday, October 10, 2012

I'm having a day ...

I had a day a couple weeks ago where it felt like everything was falling apart and today I'm having a day where it feels like things are falling into place - a brand new place, but a better place.  Every time I have a horrible day I need to remember days like this where I look back and say "Wow, I'm sure glad that other stuff fell apart or this wouldn't be happening. I'm so relieved!"

I woke up this morning for the first time in a week and realized I hadn't coughed at all during the night and that my sinuses finally aren't hurting as badly as they have since Sunday before last.  Then when I took my daughter to the bus stop my friend/neighbor waved me over to say she needs to talk to me.  She had been my childcare two days a week during my last job and she told me today she was offered a full-time job that starts this Monday! So, had I still had my last job I would be screwed for on-going childcare so it validated even more how it was meant to be that wasn't the job for me.  Then to make things even better she asked if by any chance I wanted to switch and do after-school childcare for her daughter five days a week now? Of course! Not only do I not need childcare, but I still have my mornings free to get all my horse stuff done and errands done (something my daughter is not thrilled to do after school).  Her job is only temporary - anywhere from one to three months.  But hey! It's a few months to not have to look for a job and relax about money worries.  Yay!

I also applied for a Sunday nursery position at a local church that I visited and liked, but they had an interim pastor I didn't like at all so I thought I'd check back when they hired a new one.  I just got an email this morning saying they were reviewing applications right now for the nursery position and oh, by the way, they hired a new pastor and he starts on Sunday.  So, I went to their webpage and looked him up and he and his family look awesome! So, even if the nursery position doesn't work out I have a local church I can visit that I might actually like.  I'm so incredibly picky about churches that I was getting resigned to not having one to belong to even though I really like having that spiritual community.  But it's extremely important to me that my spiritual community is not filled with people who believe things that are so opposite of what I believe and that happens a lot - most of the time in fact - with Christianity.  My main issue is that I do not believe that believing in Jesus and following dogmatic, man-made rules is your ticket to Heaven and that is a main theme in most Christianity.  I believe that developing your own personal relationship with God and the way you treat others and the rest of the world is the ticket to Heaven - in fact it is the ticket to whether you experience Heaven or Hell on Earth too.   And I don't think Jesus magically rose from the dead which really pisses off most Christians.  And I don't think he died to redeem us from our sins.  I think he died because of political crap and B.S. and only we can redeem ourselves from our sins by changing our attitudes and behavior toward ourselves and others.  That also doesn't go over well with a lot of Christians.  Oh well.  I will find my place.  I totally respect my friends who have different Christians beliefs  - many of my good friends are non-denominational/"born again" Christians - than me because they are about the sweetest, best people I know, but I wouldn't fit in with their pastors.  One of the quotes that struck me most in the bio of the new pastor at this church I like was "pretty sure that God is very fond of him - and fond of everyone else too". 

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