Today my daughter is nine years old! I know people say it all the time but I really mean it to the depth of my being, the day my daughter was born was the beginning of the best time in my life. Getting married was pretty great but was trumped only by the day my daughter was born. Granted, I spent the first two weeks or so wondering who I was going to get to raise her because I was sure that I would screw that task up so horribly I could never actually do it - it still was a magical time. And to be honest, it is still a magical time. She's growing up to be a really great person and I'm very proud of her. I'm also constantly amazed that I'm a good mom. I will never quite figure out how that happened because for most of my life even though I liked the idea of being a mom was convinced I would horrible at it. So, not sure what happened but it's a huge source of joy every day to have my daughter in my life and to have such a good relationship with her.
I'm feeling a little better today - enough so that I realize how much my pelvis (where my cracked sacrum is) hurts. This is good news because the rest of my body doesn't ache as badly as it did yesterday so I'm noticing the whole cracked sacrum thing. I just have to move very slowly then I'm ok. And I have to sit in such a way I'm not putting any pressure on it (that is challenging). I have high hopes I will feel up to going to work at least for half the day tomorrow which I'm sure they'll be happy about.
Yesterday I felt up to going with my husband out to the barn to pick up my car that had been there since I got carted off in the ambulance. Everyone had heard what happened and when I walked in the barn a couple people said, "Hey - are you allowed to be here?" I assured them I wasn't going to be riding or doing anything strenuous. I stopped to fill in some folks on how I was and saw Maiden looking out of her stall with an anxious look. Lately, when I walk in she whinnies for me but this time she was looking at me, then would look away, then look back at me, then look away again. So, I slowly shuffled over to her and she pinned her eyes and gave me the stink eye until I held my hand up to her and she sniffed and licked my hand. Then she dropped her head so I could scratch her behind the ears and she laid her head against my chest and nibbled at the collar of my coat. When I turned to walk away to go ask my husband to help me lead her to the cross ties, she let out the biggest sigh. I think she really was worried I was not coming back for her.
My husband doesn't have any experience as horses so I showed him how to lead her, but since I didn't want anything unexpected to happen I walked in front of them so that I could grab the lead rope if she spooked. But as it happened she kept rushing ahead of my husband so she could walk next to me, so I ended up just taking the lead rope anyway. She was very good and I didn't even really have to hold on to the rope, she just walked nicely next to me. Walking back to her stall later she did have a little trouble walking as slowly as I was walking but she gave it a shot. I was able to take off her blanket and give her a half-ass grooming and she was very patient about that. And after that I was so exhausted I had to come home and head back to the couch. But it was nice to be out and see her and see she's doing well.
She's hopefully going to start training with Trainer K. next week two days a week and I've asked her previous owner if she could ride her some over the next six weeks so she'll get some work. And I'll ask the orthopedic doctor at my follow-up on Tuesday when I can start lunging her and doing ground work with her.
I need to send a thank-you card to the E.R. doc and his team because I was very happy with their care and I heard the doctor was brand new to that hospital so I thought it would be good for the hospital to know he's doing well. Even though the nurse made that comment that Trainer K. and I are "stoic" I think it also helped that everyone was very relaxed and friendly and that immediately put me at ease. Even the x-ray and CT techs were relaxed chatterboxes who didn't act at all like there was any emergency going on and there is a huge emotional benefit to that. I think it subconsciously relieves patient anxiety because if the professionals aren't freaking out then it must be ok. Granted what I was going through wasn't an emergency, but still, to have that light and friendly attitude made it feel more like being served in a coffee shop on a sunny day then going in to get CT scans to see if my kidneys had been damaged.
I'd also like to send a dvd of Dr Horrible's Sing A-Long Blog to the EMT team with a thank-you note but I have discovered that finding out who they are by just knowing it was Sno County Fire & Rescue is not an easy task. There are so many districts and so many stations I have no clue who they were. That is frustrating. You spend forty-five minutes with folks in a really intense situation - especially Doogie Howser who sat with me and held my hand, and you talk about all sorts of personal stuff in your lives and feel like you are on the way to being friends and poof - you never see them again and don't even know what their names were. Doogie Howser did say it's a hard part of their job to not get to know what happens to their patients they transport so I wanted to be able to tell him that it wasn't all overkill like I was hoping and I really did break a couple things - but that I'm fine now (besides being sore) and they all really helped me. But then they probably have already forgotten me after going through the same thing with lots more people over the last couple days. I thought momentarily that maybe I want to change careers and be an EMT so I can be there for people like that but sadly my stomach is not strong enough to deal with the kind of gruesome injuries they see frequently.