Monday, February 24, 2014

The hamster in my head

I woke up from the strangest dream this morning and what's weirder is I realized it's not the first time I've had it.  I was away somewhere at a conference for my work (my random dream-related work) and someone asked me when I'd last fed the hamster.  I realized I had completely forgotten I was in charge of someone's hamster because I'd put it in our amoire and shut the door and then forgotten about it.  Then I realized I'd done this before with someone else's hamster and it had almost died had they not come back to get it.  We tracked down the person who had the hamster in their head (???) and my friend opened up a door in the back of his head and said the hamster was severely dehydrated and almost dead.  I explained she didn't have to open the full back of his head, just the side so we could get to the water bottle and fill it, plus opening the full back of his head exposed his whole brain and that could lead to infection and blood loss.  Then the hamster was inside my head.  I have no idea what that means and it could mean absolutely nothing except that my subconscious was thinking of the scene in Agents of Shield where they take off the top of Coulson's head to use fancy electronic probes to bring him back to life.  And how I almost forgot to go feed my horses yesterday.  Although, I have had dreams before where I forgot to take care of a hamster and suddenly remembered right before the hamster died.

I'm really struggling with Maiden's front feet right now.  Specifically her right one.  She has an open crack all the way down the back of her frog to her coronet band which is problematic because one, it is sore, two it gets rocks and twigs stuck in there and hurts to walk and three sets her up to get another abscess.  It is the same thing as if your cuticle next to your toenail cracked wide open - imagine how that would feel while you're walking? Then imagine getting a pebble stuck in it and having to walk.  Aaargh.  It was doing better when I filled it with Epsom salt and wrapped it and put a boot over it the week I was gone at school.   Then it started to come back so I packed it with Epsom salt, wrapped it, put her turn-out boot on it and two days later she had somehow managed to destroy her turn-out boot.  So, I've been using Thrush Buster on it to dry it out and at least keep it from getting an infection but that appears to be doing no good.  So, I either have to get another turn-out boot of the same kind or find a better one.  Although my vet said that is the best one there is.  Gah.  Pasture horses are hard.  This is where she needs to be for her mental health because she hated living in a stall, but at the same time when it's raining every day and night for days on end there is no dry place to put her because even the non-muddy grass areas don't dry out.  I just need to find the ultimate turn-out boot that she can't destroy.  Or buy a whole stack of them to keep replacing them.

After our week on the magical island my husband was ever so slightly interested in looking at farms out there.  But right now he is so overloaded by work that he says he doesn't have time to think about anything as big (and traumatic) as buying/selling houses or moving.  Which has not stopped me from researching the area and looking at properties for sale.  I never know whether or not to believe these tugs in my heart that tell me to do stuff but so far they've not led me astray.  It's just a matter of listening to it.  And right now my heart says I feel very at home on the magical island and if we're going to sell our current house (which I love - but unfortunately it has no land to keep our horses at home) I want to buy a farm there.  Even though in my head everything says we should stay in this neighborhood because this is where all my connections for horses are and it would technically be easier to start my equine massage business with connection - at least you would think.  But I've found if I follow the tug in my heart more than the logical part of my brain, I end up much happier in a better place all around.   My commute to pony school would be horrible but my husbands commute would be great because it'd basically just be get to the ferry, ride the ferry, be at work.  Maybe see a couple whales along the way.  So, logically that's a big factor for me too is that by summer I'm only working two days a week at pony school but he's working five days a week at his job and deserves a better commute.   We will see.  It is all on hold until things at work calm down but I do find myself daydreaming about it and trying to think of it in a realistic light - not just the happy fantasy light of not really living there yet.  And I still feel like it's the place to be even if logic says otherwise.

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